The Truth Seeker

Footnotes with source documents available at www.thetruth-seeker.com

Chapter 10 — Eckankar Following the Twitchell Years

Earlier chapters have presented the true history of Eckankar from its origins in 1965 to Paul’s death in 1971. Most Eckists know little about this subject and virtually nothing about what has happened since Paul’s death. Harold has put forth a sanitized version of this history, but it captures little of the organizational tumult of those years.

Outsiders who have read David Lane’s exposé of Paul and Eckankar,¹ or who have scoured the Internet to learn from former Eckists, have a dramatically different view from those still in the teaching. Those who have seen behind the façade assume that Eckists are aware of Lane. They do not understand how followers could stay in the teaching after such troubling if not devastating revelations. For the most part, Eckists do not know Eckankar’s history or controversies. They are busy spreading the message and studying Eck works. There is virtually no discussion or awareness of the real history of this teaching and the often bitter experiences of those who have left. In spite of the information on the Internet, both pro and con, Eckists, particularly those who have been in the teaching a long time, remain unaware of it.

Eckists tend to leave the path when they discover aspects of the teaching that cannot be reconciled with their quest for spiritual truth. Those who remain attribute departures to failure of belief and see themselves as more dedicated. They feel good about their teaching and the love that is palpable at Eck gatherings. It is this feeling of joyful community that was an important and beautiful part of my experience in Eckankar. But this harmony and love come at a high price. The faithful live in the dark, unaware of the deception and upheaval. When members of any spiritual path practice the policy of “don’t ask, don’t tell,” they jeopardize their spiritual growth by avoiding the truth. And Eckankar carefully cultivates avoiding the truth.

Since the publication of Lane’s book more than twenty years ago, wildfires of doubt and controversy have sprung up in Eckankar communities. When a community comes across a copy of Lane’s book or other similar publications on the Internet, it explodes in controversy. I have talked to Eckists from many of these areas during my recurrent bouts of introspection and have helped them to work through the questions and remain committed to Eckankar.

For this reason, I bear responsibility for not discovering the truth earlier. There are many Eckists who respected my commitment to truth and remained because they assumed others and I had reviewed Lane’s book and had found no substantial merit to his allegations. My failure to discover and communicate the truth about Eckankar at an earlier point is a shortcoming that I address by this book.

The Death of Paul Twitchell

Nothing has been easy in the unfolding of Eckankar. Even Paul’s death in 1971 occurred amid confusion and wonder. Interpreting his death as ordained from on high, one of the more respected members of Eckankar at that time, claimed that, owing to disobedience to the Vairagi Masters, Paul had been “removed for cause.”² Given the fictional nature of the Vairagi Masters, this explanation for Paul’s transition from this lifetime may have been wishful thinking or imaginative reconstruction by someone ill-disposed to Paul. However, in light of later events, it is interesting in at least one respect: Graham’s journal records an account of a conversation with a representative of the Nine Silent Ones who states that Paul’s “assisted early exit” occurred because of falsities and distortions he had injected into the teaching. Paul was not able to fulfill many of the commitments he had made to his chelas. First, he had declared that his mission was a five-year one, starting in 1965. But in 1970, Paul did not want to give up his position. It was necessary for him to develop a plausible scenario to explain continuing as the Mahanta, the Living Eck Master . After all the stories he had already come up with, this was simple.

Paul used the slow development of the next Living Eck Master to justify staying on. The putatively all-knowing one realized this only when his term was about to end. Consequently, Paul indicated that he would be passed over for the next candidate when the time finally came to step down. This change in Paul’s story was one of the first public clues to Paul’s deception and resulted in many Eckists leaving the fold at that time. In an attempt to quell the storm, Paul wrote a letter to the chelas in 1971, but it had little effect. Finally, Paul’s attorney, in a letter to the chelas, proclaimed, on Paul’s authority, that the next Living Eck Master was a child in waiting and would not be ready for another fifteen years.³ Of course, this was a fabrication, but it gave Paul another fifteen years of power. He had no idea in 1965 that his spiritual start-up would be so successful. No sense turning over the company to a perfect stranger when things were going so well! Unfortunately, Paul’s body was not up to the wait. Once again, his prognostication was faulty and the succession of the Eck Masters did not occur according to plan. For anyone counting, that would be the third time in three tries that the “succession thing” fell through because no new Mahanta was ready.

For a master who professed omniscience, omnipotence, and omnipresence, Paul was remarkably wrong about every aspect of this prediction. In fact, he died shortly thereafter, failing to fulfill his prophecy of staying in power for many more years. This fact alone raised considerable questions in the Eck community. But the show had to go on. Enter Rebazar Tarzs, who, once again, had to be summoned to rescue Eckankar so that the story could continue. While Eckankar searched for a fill-in for the Mahanta, the Living Eck Master, the legend of Rebazar Tarzs would suffice to fill the void temporarily.⁴ These were particularly challenging times within the Eckankar family. Who would be the next Living Eck Master? Who would appoint him? How would he be announced?

I was not there at the time and only have second-hand accounts of what transpired. But it is certain that this transition was extremely difficult for Gail. How could she find someone who would carry on the story line? What if a successor discovered the truth about Eckankar’s founding? How could she continue to play a central role in the religion if it was built around a man other than her husband? Even with the creativity endemic to Eckankar leadership, there was no scenario that could move her into a position of leadership.

It is unclear how much Gail knew of Paul’s fabrication of Eckankar. However, Gail knew Paul before he came up with the concept of Eckankar and its august Mahanta, the Living Eck Master. Yet, Paul appears to have convinced her of his authenticity. This is not surprising given his capacity to believe his own fiction. But Gail certainly knew that this teaching, whose creation she had witnessed, was far from the most ancient on the planet and the source of all other religions. Even Paul’s charisma and her adoration of him could not have deluded her into believing that fantasy.

Enter Darwin Gross, a handsome single man in whom Paul had placed a great deal of trust. His devotion and personal attractiveness might fill the needs of the operation. Darwin ascended the mountaintop in one gigantic leap. After only two years in Eckankar, he became the Living Eck Master. Shortly thereafter, he married Gail. They had pulled it off in spite of Paul’s failure to fulfill a prerequisite of the Shariyat-Ki-Sugmad — to prepare and announce the next Living Eck Master. But true to their partnership and the requirements of the Shariyat, Gail announced that she had a special dream in which Paul named Darwin the next Living Eck Master. Eckankar had produced yet another story to fill the gap between fiction and reality.

Darwin’s ascension to the position of Living Eck Master did not go unchallenged by many Eckists. There was widespread incredulity that a newcomer could become the spiritual leader of the “oldest teaching on the planet.” As could be expected, many were disillusioned by Darwin’s ascendancy and unseemly marriage to Gail. It all seemed to fit together too conveniently. The suspicious left and the true believers remained. Despite scandal and disillusionment, the personable and charismatic Darwin Gross directed Eckankar to tremendous growth.

The Darwin Gross Years (1971-1981)

Darwin was prepared for and presented to Eckankar by Gail and others, apparently convinced that he was who they said he was. There was nothing at the time to suggest to Darwin that Paul’s claim of antiquity for the Vairagi Masters was not true. When the time came for Darwin to become Mahanta, he had nothing to guide him, except what Paul had taught and what Gail had reinforced.

Darwin was, at least initially, an extremely humble, devoted, and sincere God-seeker. I came to Eckankar soon after he had become the Living Eck Master. Darwin’s talks were not particularly inspiring, but they were straightforward and shorn of excess emotion. I was struck by his music in those days. He once recorded an album of songs that were delicate and filled with love. This was a very different Darwin Gross from the one that emerged years later imagining himself an accomplished jazz and blues musician.

I worked with Darwin on a number of projects during those years, as a sometime-roadie caring for his xylophones, designer of a series of workshops on “The Universal Laws of Life,” and member of a training team for High Initiate training. Darwin rapidly grew into his position and appeared to believe in his new role. He was an engineer, not a scholar or writer. His principal strength was his skill with people. He was marvelous at walking the aisles during a seminar, allowing the faithful to catch a glimpse of the “God-man,” who would graciously touch those fortunate enough to get close or look him in the eyes in a ritual known as “the Darshan.”⁵ All of this was quite effective and always inspiring to watch. The belief of the membership in Paul’s creation was very high.

The power is always in belief. Like any faith-healing tent on a warm summer evening, miracles happen for those whose belief is powerful enough. When people believe their work is for the highest representative of God on earth, their actions and experiences are filled with the force of spirit. This is belief at work. No wonder that spiritual experiences are common among Eckists, for Paul wove an awe-inspiring fiction that “programmed” their experiences.

Given Darwin’s effectiveness in his role, one might well ask, what’s the harm? If it works, why not just use it and stick with it? But there is only one problem with this. It is a problem that Darwin ultimately encountered and that Eckankar, by this book, will now encounter. The problem is truth. Truth has a funny way of rearing its head at inconvenient times. It often appears when the forces of suppression feel that they have won a permanent victory. But victory in suppressing the truth is never final. It is always temporary and ultimately unsuccessful. And when the truth is finally revealed, dislocation occurs that, while initially painful, always results in spiritual growth. What is lost is the effort and energy expended in a direction that must be reversed. This is the prerequisite to moving ahead on the path to God-Realization.

After a few years, Darwin’s focus changed. He pursued worldly ambitions more intently than his spiritual mission. The inappropriateness of many of his actions became evident. It undermined his accomplishments and eventually got him banned from the teaching that he, as much as anyone, built into a sizable movement. Darwin was not prepared to live up to the high standards of the Living Eck Master. He spoke, often quite convincingly, about the standards of truth and the behavior articulated in the Shariyat-Ki-Sugmad. Indeed, he even wrote:

The leaders of ECKANKAR have the eyes and ears of the world upon them at all times and they should have the highest ethics and morals known to man and if they don’t, they aren’t really and truly ECKists.⁶

But Darwin soon abandoned this position for a more flexible one that allowed him peccadilloes and eccentricities. He justified it by thoughts put forth by Paul in The Spiritual Notebook:

The Living ECK Master stands alone; he is a law unto himself. He does as he pleases, has what he wants, comes and goes absolutely at his own will, and asks no favor of any man. Neither does anyone hinder him in the execution of his will, for he has all things at his own command. . . . He does not work by time, nor is he bound by any rule or custom outside of himself.⁷

It is not difficult to see how an individual with a predilection for the jazz life and celebrity, who just happened to be the Mahanta, might get carried away with the personal freedom that this standard would permit. Darwin was, apparently, quite prepared to follow this more liberal standard and even to stretch it if needed.

Darwin argued vociferously for his personal freedom in spite of his high spiritual responsibilities. In the preface to one of Paul’s books, Darwin, after asserting that Eck Masters have a greater knowledge of spirit than “the average man can conceive,” went on to say:

[I]t isn’t stated in the teachings of ECK [actually it is!], nor am I saying that the Living ECK Master is unfolded spiritually greater than the next man. For on the outer it wouldn’t show, due to the fact that what one does and what one says does [sic] not necessarily mean that one should judge one’s spiritual unfoldment.⁸

In this somewhat obtuse passage, Darwin tried to create space for himself by telling followers that his high state of spirituality should not be judged by what he did or by what was seen in the outer man. Darwin’s view of spirituality and how it manifested in his life was a necessary construct for him to believe that he was still the Mahanta, “God made flesh,” and the “Son of God.” How else could he reconcile an incongruous pattern of indulgences that left his followers wondering about their master? Darwin seized upon Paul’s proclamation that a master answers to no one and does what he pleases. If reports of his drinking and womanizing are true, then he was in grave need of a cover. That is undoubtedly why he grasped at straws to reconcile his behavior with the high moral and ethical principles for which Eckankar stood.

Before Darwin’s behavior reached its acme, he and Gail divorced. This was closely followed by her shocking disavowal of Eckankar. Gail was quoted in two separate reports acknowledging that Eckankar was a fraud, that Paul had simply created it. Both reports have been in book and Internet form for many years, without, to my knowledge, Gail ever repudiating them. After selling her rights to Paul’s writings to Eckankar for $500,000 , she has had nothing to do with the teachings since then.

The first account of Gail’s repudiation of Eckankar comes from one of her acquaintances, who heard a taped account of Gail’s conversation with a friend who had doubts about Eckankar’s legitimacy.

I was in his [Charlie Wallace’s] kitchen when he telephoned Gail about 1981 or 1982. At the time he had a ranch in California. He and Gail had been friends in the past. Charlie was one of the few guests invited to she [sic] and Darwin’s wedding in Sedona. I taped the conversation. . . . Gail was helping her friend Charlie, to come to terms with Eckankar. She told him Paul made up the whole Eckankar thing. I was there during the telephone conversation . . . find Charlie and ask for the tape and hear it yourself.⁹

David Lane, when speaking about the legitimacy of Eckankar, writes: “How can this be possible when Twitchell’s own wife (and, I would suggest, co-founder), Gail, has privately admitted that Eckankar is a ‘fraud.’”¹⁰

After divorcing Gail, Darwin remarried but quickly had his new marriage annulled. From that point, allegations of drinking and womanizing grew.¹¹ His path to excommunication was paved with fun and excitement. He enjoyed traveling with his band, playing the xylophone, singing, and spreading the message of Eckankar. Darwin even purchased a private executive jet (with Eckankar money) to fit his new image of a high-flying jazz and blues man. This was an extremely sensitive topic in Eckankar and a closely guarded secret. To accomplish this, Darwin set up an Oregon company, Dharma Aircraft, to purchase and own the plane, a legal device to avoid California sales taxes.¹² This ploy got Eckankar embroiled in a tax investigation by the State of California.¹³ (I once toured the plane during a stopover in Washington, D.C. when Darwin was speaking and performing at an Eckankar seminar. It was quite impressive!)

Darwin was also having a number of physical problems that interfered with his duties as the Living Eck Master. For this reason as much as any, Darwin sensed that the timing was right to step down and turn over some of the travel and spiritual duties to someone else. He had become a businessman by then and took great pride in his ability to wheel and deal. Darwin’s plan was to take over the business operations of Eckankar and leave the travel and other spiritual duties to a successor.

Harold Klemp Becomes the Living Eck Master

Harold’s dizzying ascension from proofreader to Living Eck Master constitutes another intriguing story in the line of the three Eckankar masters. In 1981, the transfer of the Rod of Eck Power took place as Harold Klemp became the 973^rd (more accurately, the third) Living Eck Master. Harold was not named the Mahanta at that time as it was Darwin’s intention to retain the Mahanta portion of the title. Then too, Paul had messed this up with a story line that a Mahanta would not follow him for quite some time.¹⁴ Both Darwin and eventually Harold disagreed with this and came up with their own story lines to demonstrate that they were “the real deal.”

Darwin thought that, though he had relinquished the role of Living Eck Master, he would retain control of the organization and continue wearing the mantle of Mahanta. Harold, he judged, had good writing skills but was meek and malleable. Based on my conversations with Darwin, he, essentially, saw Harold as a “wimp.” It is probably for this reason, not an inner spiritual revelation or a mission to carry out the will of God, that Darwin selected him as the next Living Eck Master.

Harold Klemp and God-Realization

Harold presents his God-Realization experience in his Child in the Wilderness. It is worth looking at here. Remembering an encounter with a stranger who operated a drawbridge in the town in which he worked, Harold told of a rebuke he received from this stranger, who spoke with the wisdom of a spiritual master. This set the stage for his God-Realization experience:

God-Realization may span from a profoundly beautiful experience to the ruthless tearing away of one’s final illusions.¹⁵

His own such experience started with a series of entreaties from a bartender, who, unaware that he was being used as a spiritual channel, told his future:

[B]efore the night was out I would face a challenge so dreadful that nothing in my past could compare with it. No matter what was said for me to do, it must be done instantly, with complete faith in the Mahanta. Further, I would ride in an ambulance before the sun rose in the morning. “Go to another town,” he warned. “Don’t let them take you to our hospital. An engine will be switching freight cars and block the tracks. Just when you’ll need help fast.”¹⁶

Shaken by the warning, Harold again ventured to the bridge and the shack of the strange man, which seemed to him to be a “way station on the road to God.”¹⁷ Freezing but enlivened by the stranger’s words, he remained for a period until challenged to “meet yourself.”¹⁸ Accepting the challenge, Harold describes what followed:

The stranger broke in on my thoughts. “Look there!” he said. “The Light of God!” From out of the night, as if from a distant lighthouse, came a searing bolt of blue-white light that pierced my heart. He smiled. “The Light of God; It shines for thee.”¹⁹

Harold’s adventure on the bridge that night was the foundational experi ence from which he claimed God-Realization and mastership. Whether or not it occurred, only Harold knows, but many have questioned the validity of this experience. Perhaps most problematic is the utter earthliness of the encounter, where the ocean of love and mercy was supposedly brought to earth on a bridge. This is in sharp contrast to the almost uniform experience of others, who were required to raise their vibration to transcend the physical and experience the inner realities of God.

Harold’s adventure in God-Realization, and his claim to mastership, are further compromised by his conception of what it meant to serve God:

My vision of what it meant to serve God was like that of many others: wander at will, shun responsibility, and appear saintly.²⁰

But a spiritual master does not live a vagabond life, shirk obligations, and “appear” spiritually advanced — he is spiritually advanced. Harold’s story describes an individual not in control of himself, desperately searching for a connection with God reality.

Let us return to his narrative. The wise stranger suddenly and inexplicably changed into an indignant bridge tender, who exclaimed, in a decidedly unspiritual manner, “What’s a matter with you. . . . You some kinda jerk? Get away!”²¹ Harold’s own account almost concedes he was unbalanced. He was grasping at straws to regain some sense of himself and to find the meaning of the frightening experience:

Contradictions boiled within me: I was joyous, yet pathetic; light, but melancholy; free, yet not free.²²

The overwhelming experience on the bridge had left me in a state of imbalance, but not completely robbed of my senses.²³

What followed challenges Harold’s assertion of not being robbed of his senses. Interpreting an earlier discussion with the stranger about the Mountain of Yama (Mountain of the King of Death), Harold somehow divined that he should jump into the river in order to confront his fear of death. In a more reflective and perhaps more balanced moment, Harold wrote:

It is easy to say, A [sic] clear-cut case of delusion; or madness, brought on by too much stress. That is an easy way out. Before this experience was over, I would realize firsthand why some people commit suicide: to please a tyrannical God.²⁴

Harold’s God-Realization experience and attendant imbalance raise reasonable questions about his sanity and hence the experience’s validity. Certainly, a delusional state is one in which there is the possibility, if not the probability, of experiencing other dimensions of reality. Without the grounding of knowing where one is and how properly to interpret what is happening, one is apt to be a pawn of some astral entity. Whatever the true nature of Harold’s experience, it certainly had a transcendent impact on him, but one for which he was to pay a heavy karmic price.

Having made the plunge, Harold was surprised that the stranger he had counted on to throw him a lifeline was nowhere around. He had to save himself. Finding a cable anchoring a light pole, he pulled himself to shore. Saved from himself, he made his way home where he pondered what he believed was God-Realization. Concerned with pneumonia, he called an ambulance and soon was in the care of professionals, who assessed his condition and, from his perspective, saved him from Yama, the Angel of Death. In a fevered and delirious state, he insisted on going to a hospital in a neighboring town, in accordance with the bartender’s instructions. Shivering from his exposure to the frigid waters, Harold recovered. In time, the doctors pronounced him fit to return home.

Harold’s encounter with the light and sound and claim to God- Realization are among the most bizarre encounters I have come across in all my readings on experiences of God-Realization. But this does not necessarily invalidate it. No one can say exactly what the experience is, and no one can offer any proof of experiencing it. It is always a claim made by one who believes, or at least professes to believe, he has had the God-Realization experience.

Harold’s adventures did not end here, for his continued unbalanced actions ultimately put him in a mental institution. The next part of his story is equally bizarre, but perhaps recognizable to those who have felt the deep longing in their hearts to serve God in any manner directed. The Biblical account of Abraham’s willingness to sacrifice his son, if that was God’s will, is an example. The willingness to abide the inner direction of God, in spite of its outer absurdity, is a common element in those who reach total surrender. But this desire for service and sacrifice can be taken to extremes. The individual can lose all perspective as well as that most vital of tools, common sense. This might be amply demonstrated in Harold’s continuing saga. While all of the evidence was to the contrary, he was not cognizant of his state of imbalance at the time: “[I]t really never dawned on me that I was very out of balance at that moment.”²⁵

Divining that he must immediately go to Paul to assist in his work, Harold took a cab to the airport. He startled the driver when he thrust a wad of cash to cover a minimal fare, making the cabbie suspect that the passenger was a little touched. Continuing his mission, he moved deeper into a state of imbalance — a “catatonic state.”²⁶ What followed can best be conveyed in Harold’s own words. Following several inner nudges to make certain pronouncements to others in the airport, he caused the crowds to scatter for fear that a madman might be in their midst. Harold probably left them with little doubt:

Waiting for the next flight to board, I pondered what else I might do to achieve complete surrender. Then the thought came to disrobe. Sick at heart, I nonetheless got up to follow out the latest instructions. As I removed my coat and tie and began to unbutton my shirt, a big man barked, “Hey, Mac, you can’t do that! Call the cops.”²⁷

Pondering his situation from the local jail, Harold knew he had to get his balance back. Whatever he concluded, the authorities committed him to a hospital for an indefinite stay, where he underwent a psychological examination. Harold somehow emerged from his stay with a sense of his own mastership. Prepared or not, he would, in a rather short time, assume the position of Living Eck Master. This strange story leads us to his encounters with his predecessor, Darwin Gross.

Darwin Retakes Control

During his first years as the Living Eck Master, Harold dutifully carried out the tasks to which he and Darwin had agreed. As President, he handled the spiritual duties of the Living Eck Master while Darwin looked after the business side of Eckankar. Darwin was eventually successful in talking Harold into relinquishing the presidency to him and focusing his attention exclusively on the spiritual side.²⁸ Problems were not long in coming. In early 1983, Harold saw indications that Darwin was no longer giving him full support.²⁹ Darwin’s disregard and disrespect for Harold grew until the Living Eck Master carried little weight. Harold had no idea what was going on within the organization, as Darwin ran Eckankar as his own fiefdom. The Board of Trustees was nothing more than a rubber stamp;³⁰ the staff did whatever Darwin directed.³¹ There was only one king in the castle at that time, and it was not the Living Eck Master. It was Darwin.

Mundane matters brought things to a head. Preferring to work at home, Harold requested a computer from the office, and the managers naturally complied. Darwin got wind of it, hit the ceiling, and ordered a stop. His predecessor had refused the Living Eck Master a computer! This resulted in enormous consternation and upheaval at the Eckankar International Office.³² Darwin began to tell staff to keep all business information from Harold.³³ Harold learned of instances of Darwin speaking disparagingly of him in staff meetings, showing little respect,³⁴ and belittling his positions.³⁵

Another sore spot was the disparity in salaries between the Living Eck Master, who was then earning about $19,200 yearly,³⁶ and Darwin, who pulled in $65,000.³⁷ To Harold’s credit, he was frugal and responsible with Eckankar money. Darwin’s attitude was quite the opposite. He viewed Eckankar as his personal business. He built it up and was responsible for its flush coffers. He acted on his own, spending whatever he wanted, whenever he chose, without the consent or knowledge of anyone, except the staff who signed whatever he directed them to sign.³⁸

The Break

The break between Harold and Darwin was not long in coming. It was discovered that Darwin had transferred large sums of money to Dharma Aircraft, the company that had owned his private jet. Inasmuch as the transfer involved a considerable sum, concern was understandable, and naturally litigation ensued. Legal documents in the case between Gross and Eckankar reveal:

In June and July 1983, plaintiff [Darwin Gross] transferred more than $2,600,000 to a dormant Oregon corporation [Dharma Aircraft, later renamed Glen Eden Ltd.]. . . . Gross, who was a trustee of the Oregon Corporation, then obtained the resignation of the other two trustees without telling them of the fund transfers, and replaced them with two of his own followers. Thus, these funds were placed outside the control of defendant’s [Eckankar’s] Board.³⁹

Darwin had also announced to the staff (July 1983) that up to twenty-one members of the Eckankar staff would accompany him to Oregon, where he would undertake projects he claimed would promote Eckankar.⁴⁰

Taking such actions, without Harold’s knowledge or approval (or that of the Board), prompted Harold to take action to wrest control of the organization from Darwin. This was achieved during a Board of Trustees meeting held August 7, 1983 in Menlo Park, California, without the presence of Darwin or the Eckankar attorney, Alan Nichols. The Board, by resolution, agreed:

WHEREAS, it is in the best interests of Eckankar to make certain changes regarding officers of the corporation, it is hereby:

RESOLVED: That Darwin Gross is hereby removed as President of Eckankar and his services as an officer and employee of Eckankar are hereby terminated, both such removal and termination being effective immediately; and

RESOLVED FURTHER: That Harold Klemp is hereby appointed as President of Eckankar, effective immediately, to serve the unexpired portion of the current term of President. . . .⁴¹

The minutes reveal a tense proceeding with many strange side notes. It was later revealed that there was little discussion and consideration of the reasons for ousting Darwin. In response to a series of questions from Darwin’s attorney, who sought to understand why his client was ousted, the new Chairman of the Board, Peter Skelsky, answered:

Mr. Axelrod, the only reason I voted for removing Darwin Gross was because the Living ECK Master said it’s time to terminate him. He’s the leader of our religion.⁴²

Another interesting development in the August 7 meeting was the appointment, by resolution, of Patricia Simpson Rivinus,⁴³ Paul Twitchell’s secretary, as the new Secretary of Eckankar. Only one day later, she was, by resolution, summarily removed from this position and told that

. . . her services as an officer are hereby terminated, both such removal and termination being effective immediately. . . .

Joan Cross (later Harold’s wife ) was

. . . appointed as Secretary of Eckankar, effective immediately, to serve the unexpired portion of the current term of Secretary. ⁴⁴

The reasons for this sudden shift are not apparent from the minutes. However, we now know the conflict that caused it. Darwin’s supporters and sympathizers were removed from positions of authority. The coup was complete. It had taken Harold more than two years of being kicked around to reach the point of deciding to assert himself. It took some coaxing from the Eckankar Spiritual Council,⁴⁵ but he finally realized that he had to use his power or lose it. Harold demonstrated that he was much tougher and more cunning than Darwin had imagined. He proved not to be a wimp at all.

A short time before this meeting, Darwin backed a truck up to the Eckankar office and removed papers, books, and the entire collection of Paul’s unpublished works and personal effects then in Eckankar’s possession. This was the material that Gail Twitchell Gross sold to Eckankar, releasing all of her rights.⁴⁶ The sales contract had named Darwin as custodian and protector, which gave him some claim to the documents, even though Eckankar paid for them. The Board took immediate legal action to secure their return.⁴⁷ The materials were spirited to Oregon, but a court order resulted in their eventual return to Eckankar.

I was present in Menlo Park during this sad episode. (The minutes of the meeting held on August 9, 1983 reveal that the managers “as well as visitor Ford Johnson” were present.⁴⁸) I had been working very closely with the International Office during the time, running seminars and planning High Initiate training. We were informed about what had transpired with Darwin and the efforts of the Board to recover properties and money that belonged to Eckankar.⁴⁹

Following the meeting, I spoke with Harold and asked why he and Darwin hadn’t worked things out without lawsuits and threats. Certainly two learned masters could come to an agreement on how to serve God. I expressed concern that the dispute was tearing the organization apart. Many chelas were being pulled into camps, depending on their personal allegiances. When I asked Harold about the possibility of a split in Eckankar, he replied that he understood my concern and was prepared for the possibility. He even thought that if Darwin started a new movement, it would likely contain a higher truth than most of the other teachings available.⁵⁰ Harold had set his course, locked his rudder, and was determined to see it through. His words were a great revelation to me. I developed a deeper insight into Harold as a person and saw his inner resolve and strength. But I also saw the beginnings of his willingness to wield organizational power, a characteristic that displayed itself in unpleasant ways in ensuing months and years. I found the whole mess quite disturbing.

Even though I was present at that meeting, I knew little of the details of the power struggle. Those who worked at the headquarters knew far more, but they adopted a protective silence. The staff was far more professional about the matter than the two masters. I later learned that staff members had made efforts to get the two masters to iron things out, but with no success. Harold told me he simply did not trust Darwin anymore. Darwin apparently broke several agreements they had made in the past, and things had gone too far to be resolved.

Two individuals, one a former Living Eck Master, the other the current Living Eck Master, were fighting and shockingly unable to resolve their power struggle. It was unfathomable, and clear evidence to many who worked daily with both of them, that something was wrong. Many concluded that men who bickered like children could not be spiritual masters and chose to walk away from Eckankar. But my eyes were not yet open.

Darwin Gross vs. Eckankar

Prior to the litigation, I met with Darwin in Oregon. My purpose was to plead for reconciliation between the two, both of whom I still regarded as spiritual masters, in spite of growing evidence of their true nature. I explained to Darwin that his disrespect for Harold was undermining the very notion of the Living Eck Master and the authority he possessed. I asked why he did not show the respect appropriate to the Living Eck Master, the head of the Vairagi Order. I encouraged him to voluntarily return the materials to Eckankar and to write a letter to the Living Eck Master showing deference and acting in a manner befitting the status of a predecessor.

Darwin was not entirely receptive, but he did listen. Clearly more concerned with himself than with spiritual matters, he replied, “What do they want me to do, beg in the streets? How am I to support myself?” This shocked me. From my naive perspective, I asked why he didn’t just trust in spirit, as he had taught us, and simply manifest whatever he needed from spirit. He looked at me as if I was joking, and the conversation ended. The next morning, a group of fellow Eckists and I had breakfast with Darwin, where the topic of an apology came up again. This time, he spewed out several profanities and stormed out of the restaurant. That was my last contact with Darwin. After that, I was off for a speaking engagement in Africa.

Upon my return, I received a letter from Eckankar ordering me to stand down from all outer activities. This was the first of the major disciplines that I was to receive. Harold feared Darwin and his followers. He couldn’t be sure of my loyalties, since I had direct contact with Darwin and might have fallen under his influence. By this time, Darwin had become, in Eckankar’s eyes, a channel for the Kal — the negative force. How quickly masters fall!

Darwin eventually returned the money and all of Paul’s materials to the care and custody of Eckankar — probably not because of my entreaties, but more likely because of legal action that Eckankar had initiated. Darwin was in a difficult position. He was eventually shut off from a pension or any other support from the organization he had built. Darwin eventually sued Eckankar for breach of contract. What followed was perhaps the most sordid period in all of Eckankar’s history.

I remember talking to Harold while attending an Eckankar Seminar some time after Darwin’s firing (I was out of the doghouse by then), but before the legal battle between Darwin and Eckankar erupted. Harold described a litany of Darwin’s execrable behavior. Harold even feared for his safety, a fact that explained and continues to explain the intense security whenever he appears around Eckists. Suffice it to say that if these statements were true — and given what we now know, not everything can be taken at face value — I can understand why Darwin was ousted.

But remember, Darwin maintained that his spirituality should not be judged by his actions. Darwin insisted that there was no connection between the morality of one’s behavior and spiritual unfolding. He even said as much in court! Here is Darwin’s testimony in a deposition taken during the trial between Eckankar and him in 1984. In response to a question clarifying Harold’s statements on moral behavior and spiritual development, he responded:

A: I stated one cannot judge one’s morals, or that one’s morals have nothing to do with spiritual unfoldment, that is my understanding of the teachings of Eckankar — or Eck, rather.

Q: [A]s I understand what you’ve said, a principle of Eckankar is that . . . morals have nothing to do with spiritual unfoldment?

A: That’s the way I’ve been taught.⁵¹

On reflection, the most remarkable aspect of this entire drama was how so many in Eckankar completely missed the point. From quest for truth and desire to achieve God-Realization and become a co-worker with God, the membership had been distracted by personalities and organizational infighting. They had shifted their attention from spiritual goals to two men embroiled in a sordid, juvenile clash of wills. It is clear that Darwin bears the brunt of responsibility for this episode, but it is also clear that Harold and the Board of Trustees could have demonstrated more magnanimity, rather than the hardball tactics they adopted.

Everyone was wrapped up with concern for the fate of the masters and the schism that their disagreement had created. Eckists took sides and lost sight of the reasons they entered the teaching in the first place. The entire episode and the inability of these supposedly God-Realized beings to reach an agreement offered compelling evidence that the emperors had no clothes.

Darwin and Harold each made valiant efforts in their depositions to cover up the more unseemly parts of their dispute. They evoked religious protections, like the priest-penitent privilege, when they did not want to divulge the content of a conversation. They summoned the “spiritual secret” rationale when they could not describe the high spiritual nature of a decision or action. Harold even dug up the venerable concept of “heresy” to justify Darwin’s expulsion. As I read through the depositions, I got a taste for what it must have been like for the Catholic Church after Martin Luther posted his famous theses, though the juvenility of both Darwin and Harold made the taste rather unpleasant. The whole thing was a farce.

The absurdity is seen in further testimony from Darwin taken from the same deposition cited above.

Q: And that role [the Living ECK Master] was entrusted to you by God, wasn’t it?

A: Negative. Paul Twitchell.

Q: Did Paul Twitchell make you the living Eck Master or did God make you the Living ECK master?

A: Paul Twitchell did. God doesn’t choose the Living ECK Master.

Q: Who does?

A: Paul chose me and I chose Harold.

Q: Harold?

A: Yes, sir.

Harold strongly disagreed with Darwin on this subject, declaring a far more divine and sublime process for his selection than the mere choice of Darwin Gross:

The Living ECK Master is chosen by God. His selection to this position is evidenced by receipt of the “ Rod of ECK Power,” the spiritual symbol of his authority.⁵²

While Harold’s version is far more impressive and more in keeping with Paul’s propaganda, Harold was simply following the tradition of his predecessors and supplying an explanation that fit the need. Even here, the Eck Masters could not agree on the same story line. In another exchange, attorneys for Eckankar asked Darwin:

Q: Who is the Living Eck Master today?

A: I cannot say.

Q: Why not?

A: That’s left up to the individual to find that out for themselves [sic].

Q: Is that part of the teachings of Eckankar?

A: Sure it is. Yes. . . .

Q: You’ve said many times, have you not, that Harold Klemp is the Living Eck Master?

A: Yes.

Q: Then when I ask you the question today, who is the Living ECK Master, why isn’t your answer the same as it has been many times in the past, Harold Klemp?

A: To the best of my knowledge, it changed in January of this year.

Q: In January of 1983, the living ECK Master changed, is that correct, is that . . . [what] you just said?

A: January of this year.

Q: Did Harold Klemp pass the Rod of Power to someone?

A: He was asked to step aside.

Q: Who asked him?

A: Rebazar Tarzs and Yaubl Sacabi.

This testimony was taken on May 31, 1984. Five months earlier, Harold had issued an open letter to Darwin and the Eckankar membership:

Dear Darwin:

The Order of the Vairagi ECK Masters no longer recognizes you as an ECK Master. As the agent of the ECK, I have removed all of your initiations in ECK as well as terminated your membership in Eckankar. You are not capable or authorized to act or speak for or about the Vairagi ECK Masters, Eckankar or the ECK teachings, nor are you to hold yourself out as an ECK Master or ECK member.⁵³

In February 1984, Darwin Gross responded with a letter to the membership that paralleled the testimony he was to give at his deposition:

Dear One:

Many individuals who are spiritually awake are concerned about the misguided information coming out of Menlo Park. The Vairagi Masters do recognize me as a Vairagi Master. My initiations cannot be removed by Harold or anyone else. Harold Klemp does not have that authority. He was given a spiritual responsibility, which he has lost. He no longer holds the Rod of Eck Power. . . .

These excerpts [sic] from letters come from Eckists around the world: Very quietly, this was what was spoken from the Eck. “Harold has been removed.” I asked by whom? “Yaubl Sacabi.” Who is the replacement, I asked? “Darwin Gross.”⁵⁴

What an extraordinary turn of events! Harold had apparently beaten Darwin to the special branch of the astral library, where story lines are kept. Here we have two spurious masters, each claiming the other to be bogus, using a fictional group of masters as proof. The irony is that each master maintained an unspoken agreement that, however else he hurt the other, he would hold true to the myth that both were masters. Neither of them wanted to destroy the fiction by telling the truth that each was an imposter. Oddly, each of them had probably convinced himself that he was what Paul had made him out to be. Neither knew the full extent of the deception of the man who had started them down this bumpy, gully-filled road.

We might return to Paul’s dictum, this time with the acknowledgement of a small measure of prophecy:

Refuse to see Truth, pretend that it is impossible to know what is true and what is not, distort Truth, seek to mix it with Untruth, attempt to deceive both ourselves and others, give Truth in an unattractive manner, then chaos will reign in our lives .⁵⁵

The chaos that resulted would be hilarious if it were not so pathetic. Thousands of Eckists didn’t know what to think. They believed in the Vairagi Masters, the Mahanta, and the Rod of Eck Power. Many stayed with Darwin, but the bulk of the membership, enthralled by the Rod of Eck Power, stayed with Harold and Eckankar. But such is the fate of those who believe and follow a lie, as at that time did I. All are destined to wander in the abyss until truth finally lights the way out.

But the drama was not over. Darwin launched his lawsuit, which resulted in reams of depositions, but more importantly in the opening to the public of Eckankar’s records.⁵⁶ Some of the information reveals more of what was behind Darwin’s ouster. Harold and his attorneys argued that Darwin was a “renegade master” who engaged in spiritual “heresy:”

Plaintiff, a former Living Eck Master, has embarked on the path of heresy. For example, he claims that Mr. Klemp is no longer the spiritual head of Eckankar . . . that one’s moral behavior is irrelevant to one’s spiritual development . . . and he is promoting his own initiation scheme which is radically different than that of Eckankar.⁵⁷

The chaos continued for quite some time. Harold wrote an article describing the ways of black magicians, implying that Darwin was practicing their craft. He recommended burning all pictures, books, and paraphernalia of the dethroned one.⁵⁸ Darwin made similar implications about Harold in his edited version of Letters to Gail 3. Specifically, Darwin alleged that Harold had inserted descriptions of black magic techniques that could be used by anyone wishing to invoke dark powers. Having retained a copy of Paul’s original manuscript of this book, Darwin felt able to support this allegation.

This resulted in another lawsuit brought by Eckankar against Darwin to recover the Letters to Gail 3 manuscript, which belonged to Eckankar. Eckankar survived the legal entanglements and Darwin Gross’s name was banned from all Eckankar books, discussions, and materials. Eckists coming into the teaching after 1986 had little or no knowledge that Darwin had ever been a master. I had problems with Eckankar’s denial of the past: it was a cover-up conducted with the complicity of every Eckist that participated in the denial of the real history of Eckankar. It was disingenuous to say the least. Darwin Gross, whatever his faults, was a major figure in Eckankar, and history should not be rewritten for organizational expediency. The truth still counts!

There are other incidents in this period in the history of Eckankar. However, enough has been revealed to provide a sense of how Paul’s deceptions continued at the highest levels of the organization. Eckankar found itself having to continuously reinvent its story line. It illustrates the fate of those who continue to build a house on a faulty foundation. In the end, it cannot stand. TheTruth-Seeker web site⁵⁹ houses documents from courts and other sources about Eckankar’s past and inner workings. If more is needed to confirm the incredible events of this period, then this is the source.

The Harold Klemp Era

With Darwin out, Harold began to discover what he had inherited and what needed to be done. Several years went by during which little changed in Eckankar’s outer teaching. Harold was obviously digesting the facts about the organization that Darwin and Paul had left him. I am sure that Harold was stunned. The greatest shock must have been seeing the private Paul Twitchell reflected in the copious records that he maintained of his activities. Paul had planned well for the fame that he hoped would be his. At some point in his life, he obviously decided to speed things up and continued his usual pattern of fabrication with greater intensity.

As indicated earlier, Harold attempted to reveal the truth about Paul and to debunk the myths and fiction he had created. His famous “Death of an Ideal” writing indicated an intent to step from behind the lie and go with truth. I believe that this was his original intent. He faced a narrow tightrope, and he made an impressive effort to walk it. But in the end, he found it impossible. His ambivalence is evinced in the vacillation of his writings. As we have seen, he declared that the Living Eck Master is not God and that one should not become attached to the vehicle, or personality, of the Mahanta. But later, Harold made a complete reversal:

The Mahanta, the Living ECK Master [Harold Klemp] is SUGMAD [God] on earth and has unlimited power to carry out the will of the Supreme One in all ITS countless worlds. This is a vain boast to the ears of the profane, nevertheless the ECK initiate learns the truth for himself during the daily spiritual exercises.⁶⁰

Harold was not only perpetuating the fiction that Paul had initially created, he was now adding to it. In addition to his offerings on the astral library, Harold added:

The ECK Masters hold meetings in a number of different locations. Although their home on the Soul Plane is known to be Honardi, the immense order of Vairagi Masters is apt to send specialists from among them to gatherings on the order of business seminars. One such location is the spiritual site of Bcero Corsa, a meeting place hidden in a remote part of the southeastern United States. The approaches to it are protected by thousands of vipers that infest the swamplands. No intruder is welcome, nor is the secret path to it ever revealed to an outsider.⁶¹

Harold embraced the mythology of Eckankar, in effect saying, “If you can’t gracefully quit it, you might as well join it.” Harold has recently launched an effort to extend the teaching to every part of the world. His new book, Wisdom From the Master on Spiritual Leadership: ECK Leaders Guide, outlines the methods by which he intends to spread the message of Eckankar:

My overall mission is to tell people everywhere about the Light and Sound of God. . . . [T]he ECK arranged the task in three major steps. First on the agenda was to set up the RESA (Regional ECK Spiritual Aide) structure. . . . After the RESA structure was up and running in your home communities, it was time for step two . . . we saw the Temple of ECK manifest upon the rolling hills of Minnesota. . . . Now comes the really big step. . . . This third stage is one big project. It is an open-ended plan, without a limit to the initiative and spiritual growth that can occur among both Eckists and the people of the earth.⁶²

These are certainly noble goals. When I first read this book in late 2001, I was excited by the challenge. But it is now clear that imparting the knowledge and techniques of contacting the light and sound of God is not the only goal. Harold also has the insidious mission of luring more souls into this trap. He has embarked on another major fund-raising effort, this one urging Eckists to make Eckankar a beneficiary in their wills and insurance policies. These efforts seek to ensure that the teaching goes on and continues to gather-up the unwary. Eckists must now determine whether supporting and proselytizing Eckankar will advance the spirituality of mankind or simply further Eckankar’s organizational interests. Today, there is a massive building program at the Temple of Eck site, where the resources of Eckists pay for more monuments to Paul Twitchell, Harold Klemp, and Eckankar.

The Future of Eckankar and Its Membership

It is a wonder that Eckankar has survived all its scandals and abuses. While growth has slowed over the years, core membership has remained steady. In the past, the true believers in Eckankar regarded each exposure as a test of their faith from which they emerged victorious. As one who survived many of these tests by ignoring the truth, the victory was, in retrospect, simply an exercise in self-deception.

There are many Eckankar employees who, because their jobs are tied to the organization, may feel trapped. Others might be too embarrassed to admit they were deceived. Still others may not want to acknowledge that the teaching is only an interesting diversion, not a direct path to God. Then there is also fear of the loss of friends and the sense of community that participation in the teaching provides.

There are always reasons people remain trapped in a religion, a relationship, or anything else. But spiritual growth is the fruit of engaging truth and following its course, wherever it leads. Truth is our only and infallible guide to higher consciousness and God-Realization. Those who fail this test forget this principle of spiritual growth. They may doubt their capacity to see and know truth. But within our inner recesses lies a capacity to know truth. Some call it a gut-feeling; others call it going with the inner flow; still others refer to it as that still small voice within — conscience. Whatever name it is called, it is the inner call of soul directing us to act in our spiritual interest. Those who are deaf to this inner direction have deferred their dedication to truth for an allegiance to a religion and its leadership. The two are not the same. But the true believer confuses this point. He mistakes religious teachings and doctrine for truth. Religious teachings and doctrine can contain truth, but the ultimate source of truth for each person lies within each of us. The most that a religion or spiritual teaching can do is to lead us to the inner reservoir of truth and show us how to imbibe.

Eckankar has human nature on its side. No one wants to admit he has made a mistake. No one wants to appear gullible or admit being deceived. No one wants to lose self-reinforcing beliefs and feel terribly vulnerable. This is especially true because there is much love shared and expressed within Eckankar. But remember: positive events, people, and circumstances contain seeds of the negative, just as negative events, people, and circumstances contain seeds of the positive. They grow out of each other. There is nothing in the universe that is all bad or all good, all positive or all negative. Everything has both aspects of this duality. The reality that we perceive and experience is a function of whatever part of this duality we choose to focus on. Accordingly, what may initially seem negative may lead to important positive results.

In the teaching of Eckankar, many High Initiates are unaware of the deception and fiction underlying the teaching. They feel they have experienced positive spiritual growth and have traveled into the inner God worlds. Many have reached a point where they had to search outside the teaching of Eckankar (at least on the physical) for the wisdom that will take them to greater spiritual development. Many have taken this course because they found Harold’s spiritual nourishment to be thin soup. The reason is now clear. The three Eck Masters reflect supreme consciousness no more than any other evolved soul. Paul, Darwin, and Harold were spurious masters of a spurious teaching based on a spurious history. Unaware of the facts surrounding Eckankar, High Initiates such as myself continued to believe in the dogma of the teaching. Some feared the curses with which Paul had threatened anyone who left Eckankar.

I now laugh when I read Paul’s threats. I know that it is only belief in the curse that creates power to affect destiny. But I also feel disgust for the treachery in a potentially beautiful teaching. The practice continues with Paul’s successors, who present spiritual truths, in spoken word and in print, while allowing these odious statements to remain in other Eckankar books. Harold often shows the positive face of love and caring, which I believe is a genuine part of him. Yet the sinister parts of the Shariyat-Ki-Sugmad remain, and Harold urges followers to read and make it the cornerstone of their lives.

In the end, soul must make a choice. If this book seeks to accomplish anything, it is to remove the shackles of a religion, teaching, or path that instills fear of separation. Curses can be found in all major religions and in many personal relationships. If it is not hell and damnation, excommunication, or the devil, it is something else. Curses seek to frighten the individual into staying in place and following directions. In a later chapter, we will look at techniques for freeing ourselves and minimizing the pain of separation attendant to moving on.

One of the paradoxes of Eckankar is that the leadership’s manipulativeness is not found in most Eckists. Nor is it found in staff at the Temple of Eck, despite the legacy of Paul and his successors. Staff members are dedicated, highly spiritually-evolved beings who believe the exalted claims of the Mahanta, the Living Eck Master. I have seen first-hand the love, sincerity, and beauty in their lives. They may have questions and doubts, but they accept the core doctrine of the teaching and their own inner experiences, as formerly did I.

Many staff, past and present, lived through some of the bizarre events that transpired. Yet, as true believers, they were able to explain away or ignore obvious inconsistencies between the Eckankar teaching and the words and deeds of its leaders. There will always be those with greater loyalty to a leader and his organization than to truth and God-Realization. They will learn in time. But they owe it to themselves to decide whether it is time to move to a more enlightened spiritual paradigm, one based in truth not deception. If their belief in Paul Twitchell and Eckankar can stand this test, then undoubtedly they are in the right place.

Collaboration of Eckankar Leaders

Some in the top leadership of Eckankar, past and present, who worked directly with the Living Eck Masters, were aware of much of what was happening. In reviewing the record,⁶³ they were directly involved in hiding the truth from the membership. They built Eckankar’s reputation, particularly in the early years, as a litigious if not vindictive organization. They sued or threatened to sue anyone who challenged the authenticity of the teachings. They knew the extent of Paul’s plagiarism and other aspects of deception and cover-up by Paul, Darwin, and Harold. Yet, they did not and do not now tell the membership the truth — if indeed they know it themselves — nor do they make an effort to correct the written record. Instead, at the behest of the spiritual leader, they have used every available legal device to protect the written works of Eckankar, plagiarisms and all. They hold to Harold’s disingenuous astral library theory to cover Paul’s literary theft. Their sense of duty and immersion in the fiction of the Mahanta has likely blinded them to the truth. In fairness, however, the doctrine of the Mahanta causes them to subordinate their thinking to the judgement of the spiritual leader who, after all, purports to be “God made flesh.” They are allowed to see only part of the picture, never enough to put all the pieces together. If I had not received the unintended blessing of a six-month discipline of intense study, I too would probably have continued as a staunch defender of the faith.

The Responsibility of a Spiritual Leader

We return to the point of trust and the responsibility that spiritual leaders have to impart truth to those who come to their doors seeking to learn about God. How can they place their petty interests and concerns for financial survival above the interests of vulnerable and sincere truth seekers? How dare they betray such devotion and spiritual innocence? Would they betray their children with whom they have an equal responsibility? How can they hide the truth from the faithful?

Eckankar leaders in the field have never had access to the evidence of deception and scandal, at least not until now. David Lane brought some of the facts to light, but few in Eckankar have bothered to read him — appalling but telling. This is a measure of how much everyone, including me, trusted the leadership. Because of this trust and my belief in the teaching, I played a role in leading others down this mistaken path. But I am meeting my responsibility by setting the record straight through this book and other efforts to follow. All who have been touched by Eckankar and who now see it in a different light, will doubtedly feel the need, as do I, to share their insight with others who have been influenced by their participation and devotion.

No one has a monopoly on truth, and I certainly do not claim to have one. But each of us has an obligation to communicate what we now know to be the truth, especially if formerly we allowed untruth to use us. Some in Eckankar’s inner circle failed this test when they covered up information they should have made known to the faithful. In my case, telling the truth means cutting the cord with the teaching that, for over thirty years, I faithfully served with love and devotion. When an individual or group dedicated to the spiritual upliftment of others knowingly blocks or conspires to distort the truth, their fate is sealed. In a telling passage from The Tiger’s Fang, Paul writes:

Truth once released can never be suppressed; although it can be limited and misused. . . . I asked, “What happens if a man should see God and fail in his duty? He would never completely see God. He might get very high on the ladder of spiritual success and fail. This is the source for the legend of the fallen angels.”⁶⁴

Eventually the house of one who would distort, block, or suppress the truth of God will come tumbling down, as we have recently seen with the Catholic bishops guilty of this spiritual offense (as will be discussed in a later chapter). But it is never too late. Whether an individual chooses truth or personal and organizational loyalty is a decision each of us must make.

“Beware of Moloch”⁶⁵ and Other Warnings

Harold dribbled out some of the truth about Paul and the history of Eckankar only when he felt it was necessary. But even then, he spun the tale of Paul’s life in a manner that turned the exploits of a prevaricator into essential experiences and training for the Mahanta, the Living Eck Master, who alone in the universe is “God made flesh.” Even more tragic was each of the last two Eck Masters turning truth on its head and sabotaging the credibility of the other. Harold, in a not so subtle reference to Darwin during the turbulent days of their dispute, wrote and spoke about the worship of Moloch,⁶⁶ attempting to discredit and demonize him. Referring to the same passage as above (from The Tiger’s Fang, where Fubbi Quantz was speaking), he quotes:

He might become the leader of the enemies of light, and his lack of integrity excludes him from the society of Saints. It is really only his weight of guilt that holds him off.⁶⁷

As it turned out, both putative masters became enemies of the light, though one was more effective in using the label than the other. Both masters used personal attacks and misdirected the attention of followers from a quest for God to a test of organizational and personal loyalty. Harold’s response exemplifies the kind of defense that he has used over the years to protect Eckankar and his position in it. Harold used this approach in his letter to Graham accusing him of leading others off the path and exposing himself to a horrendous spiritual fate. Remember: he never answered Graham’s questions; he only protected his position and left a sincere God-seeker to twist in the wind. Failure to answer questions can be seen as the mercurial and enigmatic ways of a spiritual master. However, it can also be seen as the way of a power holder looking out for his interests. They are also the actions of one who has no answer and chooses to hide behind the mantle of master, leaving it to the individual to divine the truth.

Defending the Faith

Anyone who questions Eckankar is accused of being a pawn of the Kal. When these attacks are made in response to this book, the evidence that spirit has placed in front of the reader will light the way. It is equally likely that Eckankar will offer little if any guidance to leadership in the field to handle the charges. Practically none was offered after Lane’s accusations, only the partial admissions in Harold’s The Secret Teaching. Harold exposed as much as he safely could; Eckists were simply told to go on the inner. The leadership realized that loyalty to Eckankar coupled with the protective nature of the dream state would shield them and support the status quo. It was a safe strategy.

It is no wonder that so many have been kept off balance and confused for so long. They have truste